Both players slipped right into their seats and began playing quickly. Huzzah for matches played at a quick pace, right?

 

“Oh, you never told me what you were taking,” said Tatar.

 

“I'm taking odds.”

 

“Ohhh man! Big mistake!” Tatar grinned, kidding, with an “I have no freakin' idea” shrug.

 

Neither player had a 2-drop, but on turn 2, Tatar sent Gin Genie to smack Lacuna. Both recovered and play quickly moved to turn 3. Fears recruited Kingpin, Wilson Fisk, and Tatar struggled for a play. He finally decided on Mikado and Mosha. “That's hot,” he remarked as he plunked them down, again being a bit sarcastic and humorous. Kingpin smacked Gin Genie with a beefy fist, Tatar flipped Midnight Sons, and Mikado and Mosha reinforced before getting stunned by Lacuna. The twins ate it, and both players drew for turn 4 quickly.

 

Controlling the initiative for the turn, Tatar recruited La Nuit to protect Gin Genie, and gave her a War Wagon courtesy of Midnight Sons. Fears recruited Masked Marauder, gave Lacuna an Armed Escort, and formed up in an L protecting her with Marauder. La Nuit attempted to attack the Kingpin, but Lacuna used Armed Escort, and Kingpin then reinforced—a great play. War Wagon then KO'd Lacuna.

 

Next turn both players drew, and Fears discarded Sharon Ginsberg and Death-Stalker for Ginsberg's effect. He then recruited Anarchist, formed up to protect Marauder with him, and passed with Kingpin in the front row.

 

“What is that?” Tatar was legitimately puzzled. “Do you have a Grandstanding or something? You've gotta have something . . .” The skinny Tatar shifted in his chair, leaning over the table a bit to observe the field before recruiting Punisher, Executioner and sticking La Nuit in front of him. He spent quite an amount of time looking at the board and at Fears's face, until he decided he was going to stick with that formation.

 

Fears didn't really have the big plan Tatar thought he had. He pondered a bit, then paid three endurance to exhaust Gin Genie. He then team attacked with Kingpin and Masked Marauder into La Nuit, resulting in Nuit and Kingpin being stunned. He sent Anarchist into Punisher, gave him a Go in Swinging, and passed priority. Tatar flipped Judge, Jury, and Executioner and tried to exhaust Punisher to take down Kingpin, but Fears was having none, and chained Masked Marauder's effect to exhaust Punisher before Punisher gained his new ability.

 

Tatar Quick Killed Kingpin anyways. “I should've just done that to start.” Tatar lost La Nuit.

 

He opened turn 6 by recruiting Mysterious Fan Boy. Fears hit his curve too, recruiting Jaime Ortiz ◊ Damage. Fan Boy protected Gin Genie in an L, while Ortiz did the same with Masked Marauder.  

 

Punisher attacked Anarchist, opening fire on him from the back row. They both stunned. He then discarded two characters to KO Anarchist (thanks to Mysterious Fan Boy's power), had Mysterious Fan BoySwan Dive on Masked Marauder, and then let Damage swing into Gin Genie, exhausting her in response to War Wagon the Marauder. At the end of the turn, it was 21 to 12 in Fears's favor, and the only characters left on the table after the recovery were Damage and the Fan Boy.

 

Fears recruited U-Go-Girl, Eddie Sawyer and Carbone's Assassins instead of a 7-drop. “You're a friend of mine,” Tatar said to Daredevil, Guardian Devil, as he recruited him to his hidden area. This would be Tatar's third consecutive Top 20 at a PC if he could win here. “Oh man . . . we talk about how bad Mysterious Fan Boy is. But really, he's such a meatshield.”

 

U-Go-Girl attacked Mysterious Fan Boy, and he went down clean. The endurance totals were now 6 to 21. Tatar called for a judge to tell him what the official text was for Mind Over Matter. Fears passed his combat, and after reading Mind Over Matter's text, Tatar sent Daredevil into U-Go-Girl. The attack worked, and the game was now 13-6, with Fears still in the lead.

 

Tatar thought long and hard before setting a resource. The final minutes of the round ticked away as he figured out what he wanted to do, eventually settling on protecting Mysterious Fan Boy with Iron Fist, Living Weapon and hiding a shiny new Plazm behind Daredevil. Fears took a while to decide on a drop, and made a small noise similar to a sigh. “That doesn't sound like an 8-drop,” noted Tatar, “and unless he drew into two 7-drops, I don't think he has one of those either. And that makes me pleased.”

 

He certainly didn't have a 7- or 8-drop: Fears recruited The Russian, another Assassins, and Sniper, and labored over his formation for a bit. He eventually settled on, from left to right in the front row, a Carbone's Assassins, The Russian, and U-Go-Girl. Behind the Assassins he placed Damage, and behind The Russian he placed another Assassins.

 

Tatar was up, and he needed to attack. He looked from his formation, to Fears's, to his hand, to his resource row and back again. He repeated this process over and over. After eight minutes of watching him execute these motions, I made a shocking realization.

 

We were never going home. Ever.

 
*            *            *            *            *

At this point, Mr. Jason Grabher-Meyer tagged in fellow feature match reporter Tim Willoughby to entertain the crowd. Tim proceeded to make random witticisms relating to the fact that all time is just relative, and that many of his relatives had died waiting for a play from Tatar. Nobody laughed. Apparently being hard of hearing happens when you get old, and everyone was aging rapidly.

 

We now return you to the regular coverage. Nothing has changed. Unsurprisingly.

          *            *            *            *            *         

Tim handed me the laptop back. He excused himself from the feature match area, possibly to head off in search of the sweet embrace of death. I sorely wanted to follow, but luckily, just over three minutes later, Tatar finally made a move. Daredevil attacked the Assassin in front of Damage to make Fears reinforce. He did. It seemed like a waste of a big attacker.

 

Mysterious Fan Boy attacked The Russian, and Fears promptly flipped Face the Master, selecting +5 ATK. It ensured the double-stun and dropped Tatar to 0. Fears still had 7 endurance, and the back row Carbone's Assassins could be protected by Damage's effect. Tatar attempted to team attack, but Glory Hound prevented him from doing so. Plazm swung on the Assassins, it got bumped by Mind Over Matter, and that was enough for Tatar—he flipped over the face-down Penance Stare that was the remaining helpful card in his row and offered Fears the handshake.

 

Adam Fears wins the match!