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The Sentry™
Card# MTU-017
While his stats aren’t much bigger than those of the average 7-drop, Sentry’s “Pay ATK” power can drastically hinder an opponent’s attacking options in the late game.
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| Semifinals: Dean Sohnle vs. Sebastian Mueller |
| Gary Wise |
| April 10, 2005 |
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There are times in life when I feel very smart. When I win a big poker pot, understand a film on deeper levels than most, write something clever, or accurately predict an upcoming line on television, I get a little thump of pride in the back of my brain. Then there are the other times. This is one of them.
I may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but I usually feel smarter than this. See, I just witnessed the most complex game of cards I’ve ever seen, and I know that were I in either player’s shoes, I’d have screwed it up about a million and three times. Nothing makes you feel dumb like knowing someone’s smarter than you are.
The participants: Germany’s Sebastian Mueller and Canadian/English hybrid Dean Sohnle. The decks: Common Enemy, and what I can say with certainty is the best and most complex deck in the history of the game, Fantastic Fun. That’s the equipment/burn deck whose proper play is so intricate that my IQ steadily dropped as I witness it and Sohnle’s brilliance.
When I noticed this phenomenon, I started keeping tabs on my steadily dropping IQ. I’ve included my intelligence quotients at the end of each turn for your amusement. Dean, a 29-year-old displaced Canadian living in London, informed he he’d been feeling a little ill since Thursday. This just makes what you’re about to read even more remarkable.
Game One – The Odyssey
As the game started, with Sebastian winning the coin flip and choosing evens, Dean informed me that he’d been playing the deck for four months. Sebastian, meanwhile, has been running Common Enemy. This was obviously to be a matchup of two experts exercising expertise. Both players mulliganed and we were ready to start.
Dean started things off by playing Ant Man, which Sebastian, a native of Cologne, Germany, responded to with “the old man”, Boris. Ant Man attacked, and the score was 49–48 Sohnle. My IQ started the match at around 135. I can’t remember the specifics in my present haze.
Sebastian played a resource and passed the build to Dean on turn 2, which Sohnle was more than happy to take advantage of by playing Invisible Woman, The Invisible Girl, placing the invisibility counter on the little lady, and flipping Antarctic Research Base—the engine Fantastic Fun runs on. Dean then played The Pogo Plane on Sue, drew a card (costing me an IQ point, as each card after the second drawn each turn would eventually do), and passed the turn. Boris attacked Ant Man, leaving dean at 48, Sebastian 46, and me at 134.
Brace yourself. Dean, with the initiative, did the following during his build:
 Activated The Pogo Plane, discarding Mr. Fantastic, Stretch to get Baxter Building
Played a resource
Flipped Baxter Building
Activated Baxter Building
Got Fantasticar
Played Signal Flare from his hand, getting Mr. Fantastic, Reed Richards, discarding Mr. Fantastic, Stretch
Played Mr. Fantastic, Reed Richards
Activated Mr. Fantastic, Reed Richards
Played Unstable Molecules on Sue
Drew a card
Played unstable Molecules on Ant Man
Drew a card
Played Unstable Molecules on Mr. Fantastic, Reed Richards
Drew a card.
He put Mr. Fantastic, Reed Richards behind Sue. Remember, this is turn 3.
Brace yourself.
This game goes to turn 9. Let’s continue.
Sebastian fell could only watch and wait, finally getting his chance to flip Signal Flare searching out She-Hulk, which he placed in front of the old man. For all of Dean’s machinations, he passed on attacking, allowing She-Hulk to attack Sue. The score Dean 47, Sebastian 46, and Gary 126 (-1 for each card drawn or searched for).
Turn 4 started with Mueller flipping Common Enemy, which he followed up with Dr. Doom, Diabolic Genius, which he used to turn Signal Flare face down. He placed Doom behind Boris, putting She-Hulk behind Doom’s only friend.
Dean activated Baxter Building and missed. He then played Human Torch, Hotshot and played Unstable Molecules on it. He placed the Torch in front of Ant Man and Sue in front of Reed. Dean felt ready to take control of the game, but Sebastian had Reign of Terror waiting, returning Ant Man and Sue to Sohnle’s hand. Doom attacked the Torch, so Dean tried to save it by sacrificing the Molecules. Sebastian had It’s Clobberin’ Time! waiting, though. Doom 1, Torch 0. She-Hulk then attacked Mr. Fantastic, and Sebastian activated Boris to grab Savage Beatdown from his deck. He played it, stunning Richards. The torch went to the KO’d pile, Sebastian went to 41, Dean went to 39, and I went to 124.
Turn 5 is when the Fun deck usually finishes an opponent off, but Reign of Terror had done its job, slowing Sohnle down. Dean activated Baxter Building, hitting, then played Sue. Again. Another Ant Man came into play, this time with a Flamethrower. Mr. Fantastic activated and found The Pogo Plane. Dean passed the turn. This was around the time I started recognizing that I was completely lost. The action was fast and furious, the board crowding up. We were only getting started.
Sebastian flipped Signal Flare, finding Dr. Doom. He played it, turning Common Enemy back down before flipping it up again to draw a card, after which he played Boris. He put Boris behind She-Hulk with Doom in the back. They were ready for combat.
Ant Man attacked She-Hulk, but before it was legal, Sebastian played another Reign of Terror, again returning Sue and the Ant Man to Dean’s hand. Dean passed, so it was Doom’s turn. The Latverian dictator attacked Mr. Fantastic in a confused rage, having lost track of the game state himself. Richards got stunned, She-Hulk attacked Dean, and the dust settled: Sebastian 41, Dean 43, Gary 123.
With the turn 6 initiative, Sebastian activated Boris to get Tech Upgrade. Signal Flare was next, finding Medusa. Tech Upgrade found Power Compressor, which of course went on Doom, who was once again joined by Boris. Dean used Baxter Building to start his build, hitting and then playing Thing, Ben Grimm, leaving him with just twelve cards in hand. He played Flamethrower on Thing, played Sue Richards, played Flamethrower on Sue Richards, and left her in front, with Thing protecting Mr. Fantastic. Sebastian dejectedly passed on attacking, allowing Dean’s Flamethrowers to do their damage and leaving Sebastian at 31, Dean at 33, and Gary at 116.
At this point, I felt a hand pumping my shoulder. It was Toby Wachter, Metagame.com content manager, reviving me after I apparently fell unconscious from the extreme displacement of my grey matter. Completely dazed, I set my hands back on the keyboard, the paramedics appeased. The game continued.
Dean activated Baxter to start turn 7, putting Flamethrower in his hand and then in play on Mr. Fantastic after flipping Thinking Outside the Box. Finally, it was time to take the plunge, playing Mr. Fantastic, Stretch. He then activated both Flamethrowing characters and tried to activate Advanced Hardware, but realized after making these commitments that he couldn’t use it due to Power Compressor. Finally, a play I’d try to make.
Dean played The Pogo Plane on Thing and used it, only to find that he had no locations left in his deck. But just when it seemed like he might be getting a little light-headed himself, Sohnle pulled it together. Thing attacked Boris, who activated to get Signal Flare. The Canadian then played Advanced Hardware on Thing, and as he went to play Pogo Plane, he heard Sebastian say, “Let me know when you’re done,” with an amused smile on his face. Fantasticar on Mr. Fantastic, sacrifice the Thing’s Hardware, play Ant Man. Dean placed Thing in front of Ant Man and Sue in front of Mr. Fantastic, ending his . . . self-gratification.
Mueller, who was slow-cooking a pot roast during Dean’s turn, used Signal Flare to find Thing, The Ever-Lovin’ Blue-Eyed Thing, returning all of Dean’s creatures but Mr. Fantastic to his hand and starting the cycle all over again. Mystical Paralysis tapped Reed Richards and Doom. The Thing attacked Mr. F and the girls attacked Dane, leaving the score tied at 16 for all three of us. Seriously.
Dean started his first turn 8 of the tournament by watching the Hulk join the fray. He then played Sue again, transferring Advanced Hardware to the blonde before playing Fantasticar on Reed. Sebastian responded with Mystical Paralysis, exhausting Richards. Sohnle then played She-Thing and put The Pogo Plane on her. Another Pogo, Advanced Hardware, and a Wyatt Wingfoot were enough—he was done with his build, placing Sue in front of Reed, Thing in front of Wyatt, and She-Thing all by her lonesome in the back row.
Sebastian, admitting frustration, sighed “I sure don’t like that Personal Force Field.” She-Hulk attacked the Thing and Wyatt reinforced. She-Thing Attacked Wyatt (I think . . . I was busy ignoring the voices), Dean moved the Hardware to Wyatt, and they both stunned. The Thing then attacked She-Thing in an act of self loathing, and the score stood 13–4 in Mueller’s favor.
 I told you this thing ended on turn 9, so you know it’s about over. Dane used Baxter, found The Pogo Plane, played it, and sacrificed it. He then played Thing and Ant Man, whispering “stupid” to himself. Sue went in front of Reed, She-Thing went in front of Wyatt, and Thing stood alone. Sebastian played Mr. Fantastic, Scientific Genius and Kevlar Body Armors on She-Hulk and Medusa. He placed the pretty green lady in front of the green-caped man, Thing in front of Medusa, and the Hulk in front of Mr. Fantastic. It was an imposing looking army, but it wasn’t enough.
Mr. Fantastic attacked Doom, She-Thing and Thing team attacked She Hulk, Thing destroyed her Body Armor, and Thing and She-Hulk stunned. With one last gasp, Mueller attacked She-Thing with Mr. Fantastic. Dane flipped A Child Named Valeria, flipped Cosmic Radiation, and reinforced. “Show me the last Radiation,” Mueller said.
He did.
Sohnle 1, Mueller 0.
After a loss like that, there was no fighting back. Dean got the god draw in game 2, drawing off the bottom with Richards in play by the second turn. It was a remarkable match to watch, despite the melting of my brain. Unfortunately, that resulted in my total lack of comprehension of game 2. I find it remarkable that both players lasted as long as they did.
Sohnle 2, Mueller 0 |
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