When I am not playing Vs. System, I enjoy experimenting with the rituals of various traditions of divination. Whether reading tarot cards, pondering fortune cookies, or connecting the dots of my tea leaves, I am often found wallowing in the endless possibilities of symbolic juxtaposition. I don’t attempt to predict the future because I like to be surprised; rather, I look for random metaphysical meaning to enhance my real-life, flesh-and-bone experiences. It makes me laugh, and that is always good.
I was grinning my way through the final days of 2005 when I felt the familiar urge to consult a few oracles. Sets of three always ring true to me, so I decided to ask three questions of the spirit world in order to optimize my success in Vs. System. I felt around in the cupboard and chose my I Ching sticks and my Nordic Runes. I needed a third ritual, so I turned to the Internet for enlightenment. I found a website that uses coffee beans as a guide to the untouchable. I was all set.
I asked the coffee beans, “What direction should I take for Risk Versus Reward in 2006?”
The coffee beans responded:
New Orleans.
Description: While no coffee is grown in this part of the world, locals blend dark roasted coffee beans with chicory root and secret spices, creating a distinct regional trademark.
Interpretation: Now is the time to take all that you have and make it work. While your resources may at first seem limited, by trying surprising combinations, you may find a solution that is, in the end, better than any obvious idea.
Answers like that make an actual light bulb go off in my head. I thought to myself, “Surprising combinations? That’s what I do! Hey, this stuff really works! Let me try something a little more concrete.” I moved to the sacred seeing stones.
I asked the Nordic Runes, “How do I win the Atlanta PC?”
The Nordic Runes responded:
Tyr is the symbol of the warrior. This rune represents potent masculine force bringing victory in battle. Tyr is known to portend a great triumph that will be bought with a terrible sacrifice.
That one scared me a bit. I looked further into the myth of Tyr. I found out that this guy actually had to rip his own hand off to save the world from a giant wolf that was going to devour everything in existence. I got nervous about how far I would need to go in order to win the $40,000 in Atlanta, so I consulted the wisdom of the Far East.
I asked the I Ching, “Do I really have to give up 1-cost Army characters to be competitive in Atlanta, or will the X-Men set bail me out in time?”
The I Ching responded:
The Yin: Hexagram 53 (Gradual Progress): There will be advantage in being firm and correct. There will be good fortune. The situation is evolving slowly, and Yin is gaining ground. The sixth line, undivided, shows the geese gradually advancing to the large heights beyond. Their feathers can be used as ornaments.
The Yang: Hexagram 39 (Obstruction): Advantage will be found in the southwest, and the contrary in the northeast. It will be advantageous to meet with the great man. With firmness and correctness, there will be good fortune.
This got me even more confused than usual. It kept talking about being firm and correct, which is basically the opposite of my usual state of mind. Does that mean I should stand firm in my loyalty to 1-drop Army characters? Does it mean I should abandon my pet strategies and embrace a more correct competitive attitude? I adore the imagery of goose feathers as ornaments, but if the feathers represent 1-cost Army characters and they are just decorations, then should I start playing a curve deck right away? And who is the “great man” that I need to meet with in order to win? Is he a 9-drop or something?
At that point, I decided that I was going about this the wrong way. If I really wanted an oracle to steer my destiny into the future of Vs. System, then I should consult the cards themselves. It was a brilliant plan that I executed to perfection. I had exactly ten Justice League of America packs left from my PCQ prize stash. I opened five packs for the year 2005, looking for the problems that I brought into the world. The only person I can change is myself, and I aim to get better every day. After the purging of the old obstacles, I opened five packs for 2006 to show me how to make the New Year the best ever. I separated the rares immediately and listened closely for a sign from beyond to bring me the ideal message. After the epiphany rained down upon me, I built a 30-card Sealed Pack deck to expand on the wisdom I gained. It worked so well, I could hardly believe it. Check this out.
My “Cleansing of 2005” packs contained these rares, in order:
Conscription
Identity Crisis
The Creeper
Teleport Tube (foil)
New Era
In terms of actual Sealed Pack competition, these cards were not a good omen. Fortunately for me, they were merely symbols of my foregone failings. They exposed the mote in my innermost eye waiting to be cast into the black hole of the past.
Conscription is an especially disturbing card. The artwork always knots my stomach. The title means to “force someone into military service.” Worst of all, the team affiliation is not Sentinels. I have pulled three Conscriptions in Sealed Pack tournaments and I have never been able to play them. Seeing Conscription appear in this reading thoroughly convinced me to re-evaluate my obsession with 1-cost Army characters.
In my practice, an Identity Crisis appearance in a divination ritual or a Sealed Pack tournament spells “Sad Day.” Eventually, I will laugh loudly while playing it in a Constructed deck, but as a message from beyond, it cuts straight to the heart. This card screams “WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?” directly into my brain. I will attempt to come up with an answer to that question in 2006. Wish me luck.
The Creeper is a strong character in both Sealed Pack and Constructed tournaments, and he hammered home a powerful truth. I saw a reflection of myself in his psychotic swirling color scheme. It was unsettling. That Bill Sienkiewicz painting is one of the most intense visual assaults in the game and it always causes a certain amount of mental queasiness in the opponent. The Creeper looks totally . . . creepy. I guess I need to work on my image.
Things were looking bleak in the prophecy department. Then Teleport Tube beckoned me toward a brighter future, especially since it was the only foil card in the reading. It convinced me that the past should be left in the past. It taught me a lesson in humility. If Superman and his JLA buddies could launch an attack that needed to be reset, then I could surely get away with a few mistakes. The card sang to me like an angel of forgiveness. I was being granted a mulligan for an entire year of my life. I felt free.
For my final cleansing card, the forces from beyond picked me up and hurled me into a New Era. How fitting is that? The burning artificial satellite of dark days past will give way to the solid vitality of the fertile Earth under my feet in the coming year. That seems good to me. I will keep you informed throughout 2006.
My “New Era of 2006” packs contained these rares, in order:
Libra
Injustice Gang Satellite
Dr. Light, Light Shaper
Poison Ivy, Deadly Rose
Psycho-Pirate (foil)
This happens to me quite often when I am exploring the metaphysical. Things tend to fall together into perfect synchronicity. The cards in these five packs harmonized to tell an entire origin story. It was the first time I had ever pulled Libra, and his myth turned out to be fascinatingly appropriate to the reading. I learned online that Libra was a giant alien who expanded his being by absorbing the power of the galaxies using a special device that siphoned superheroes while they fought. He was focused on something beyond the personal conflict of good and evil. I admire that. Sure, Libra eventually got so swollen with super-power that he became the entire universe and died, but at least he lived his ideals.
It would have been very difficult to make a cohesive deck from the “Cleansing of 2005” cards. The characters were scattered among too many different teams. These new packs, in contrast, actually contained all seven original members of the Injustice Gang, along with enough eventual gangsters to build a strong, single-affiliation deck! It was a beautiful thing. When Libra started the Injustice Gang in 1974, he recruited Tattooed Man, Shadow Thief, Chronos, Poison Ivy, Mirror Master, and Scarecrow. Each of the founding members was included in the 70 cards I opened for 2006, although Scarecrow, Fearmonger was not the Injustice Gang version. With each additional character that fit Libra’s team affiliation, I rubbed my eyes harder, trying to believe what I was seeing. The plot twists included Infestation, and the combination of Injustice Gang Satellite and Royal Egg-Matrix confirmed my highest hopes. This was undeniable good karma for the future.
“The Libra Reading of 2006”
Characters
Libra
Prometheus
2 Ocean Master
Gorilla Grodd
Tattooed Man
Scarecrow, Fearmonger
Floronic Man, Alien Hybrid
Abra Kadabra
Dr. Light, Light Shaper
Evan McCulloch ◊ Mirror Master
The Joker, Headline Stealer
Felix Faust
Shadow-Thief
David Clinton ◊ Chronos
Poison Ivy, Deadly Rose
Zazzala ◊ Queen Bee
IQ
Infernal Minions
Creeping Doom
Plot Twists
Shake it Off
Plasma Blast
Balance of Power
Rallying Cry
Death Times Five
Glass Jaw
Counterstrike
Infestation
Locations
Injustice Gang Satellite
Royal Egg-Matrix
That is exactly how I would build the deck if I were playing it in a Sealed Pack tournament, and it would win more than its share. It is a bit heavy on the lightweights since I didn’t have any better 3-cost character choices for those slots. If this is your first look at a 30-card Sealed Pack deck, here’s a blueprint to follow:
Two 7-cost characters
Three 6-cost characters
Four 5-cost characters
Four 4-cost characters
Four 3-cost characters
Three 1- or 2-cost characters
Ten other cards
That structure gives your deck a good chance to hit its curve of characters and fill the resource row with plot twists and locations. It also serves as a secure touchstone to ground this ethereal exercise back onto the solid wood of the gaming table. I pass it along as a blessing for the future, in the spirit of improving your Sealed Pack experiences and bringing endless joy into our game. Who knows, it just might work.
Next week, I will tell the sobering story of facing the esteemed Niles Rowland in the final match of our local Sealed Pack PCQ. And, for those in the audience who are in need of some serious competitive tech, I will now impart the timeless wisdom of the most glorious Gotham Knights strategy that I have ever seen, directly from the infinitely talented deck box of Milton Figueroa in the Constructed Top 8 on that very same day. Happy New Year to one and all.
“Creepy Knights”
Milton Figueroa
Top 8, Coral Springs PCQ
December 17, 2005
Characters
4 Alfred Pennyworth
4 Spoiler, Wildcard
3 The Creeper
3 Barbara Gordon ◊ Oracle, Bird of Prey
4 Cassandra Cain ◊ Batgirl, Martial Artist
1 Batman, Vengeance
1 Batman, Caped Crusader
1 Lady Shiva, Sandra Woosan
2 Hawkeye, Leader By Example
3 Dick Grayson ◊ Nightwing, Defender of Blüdhaven
2 Azrael ◊ Batman
1 Batman, The Dark Knight
1 Superman, Big Blue Boy Scout
Plot Twists
4 Bat-Signal
4 Fizzle
3 Detective Work
4 Flying Kick
4 Savage Beatdown
3 No Fear
3 Nasty Surprise
4 Acrobatic Dodge
1 Flame Trap
Rian Fike is also known as stubarnes and he looks forward to sharing this New Era of Vs. System with you. He sees each of you as a beautiful, unique snowflake. Send questions, comments, or scathing critiques to rianfike@hattch.com.